35 Years Is A Long Time To Go Without Pants

This is probably the most familiar incarnation of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles.

 

Kinda cutesy, 4 different colours of masks.  Kids stuff. 

 

 Seriously.  35 Years Without Pants.  Drafty.

 

 

Most people don't know that the original Turtles comics were dark, edgy and aimed at a mature readership.  They were originally published in black and white and all four turtles wore the same red mask. 

 

Over the years, they've been done dozens of ways in comics and a handful of versions have been on television.  The movies tackled them and went at the property in yet other ways.

 

And in all that time, nobody thought "Hey, you know what we haven't done?  Pants."

Warning.  Non-Sequitur ahead.  Stay with me. 

 



So I have this little obsession with painting miniatures.  I love the things so much I made some chess sets out of them a while back.  You might recall.  I dearly wish the site I'm about to talk about had been around back then!  If you remember my chess set project, you might recall that I had to customize a bunch of figures to create the characters I needed for the sets.  I used something called "Green Stuff" which is a super strong epoxy putty made specially for miniature sculpting.  A file, a pick, some paint and a lot of tricky, tiny work.

Fast forward a decade and I stumble upon a site called "Hero Forge Custom Miniatures" and if you want to check it out you'll need a reasonably up to date browser.  It's a really neat spot where you can create and customize your own 30mm (about 1.25 inches) miniature and have it 3d printed and delivered to you for you to paint.  How bloody cool is that?!?!

The minis themselves are a bit pricey so I haven't yet bought any.  What's amazing though is that the site allows you to design your miniatures and store them on site until you're financially able to purchase.  I've got a folder of several dozen (!) designs so far and no sign of anyone saying "Show us the money" yet.  I highly recommend it.  Super fun and you can really go to town with your designs.  Dozens of options for outfits, weapons, tools, base decorations, posing and even horses and motorcycles to give your figure a ride.

And what does all this have to do with Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles and their lack of pants you ask?

Well, one of the options for the basic figure is a turtle/lizard type body and a couple of heads that look like a seriously menacing Adult Ninja Turtle.  Plus, I was able to create a version with pants.

Honestly, I can't figure out how this hasn't been done for these characters yet. 

Anyhow, here are my Adult Mutated Ninjitsu Turtloids.  Yeah.  I know.

This is Dali, the leader.  Serious, responsible and armed with two katana.  His elaborate shoulder brace signifies his leadership status.

 

 

This is Van Go.  He's the hothead and muscle of the group.  He carries two Sai.

 

 

This is Whistler.  He's the group's tech nerd and often wears magnification/infrared goggles.  Armed with a Bo Staff he's happier taking apart a computer than a villain.  Unlike his bare chested brothers, he wears a multi pocket vest.  For do-dads.

 

 

Finally there's Warhall.  He's the group's heart and comic relief.  I think he looks more comfortable with a couple of Tonfa than the rather goofy looking oversized Nunchucks offered on Hero Forge.

 

 

 

Now I haven't given you a great look at the back of the figures, but rest assured Hero Forge has a turtle shell option and indeed each one of my characters has a lovely full size turtle shell.  And pants.

 

A further tweak to my updated version of the Turtles.  I plan to paint them without the traditional masks.  They started out all wearing the same red masks and somewhere along the line, likely a toy manufacturer decided to differentiate them with the four colours most of us a familiar with.  While I have no problem with giving each a unique colour scheme, even the most die-hard TMNT fan has to admit it's pretty silly to have the only four talking turtles on the planet wear masks.  I like to think that by individualizing their actual outfits more than has been done before it's another link in their evolutionary chain. 

 

Unfortunately, the high end plastic (there are cheaper options) that is apparently the best print material for painting is pricey at $29.99 U.S. per figure, so I have yet to take the plunge and likely won't pick a gang of 4 for my first purchase.  I want to buy one figure and paint it before I sink any real money into the 3D printed figures.  Still, it's just amazing that this service exists at all.  I can also say that the site itself is remarkably easy and bug free to use and the results are simply astonishing.  You can create endless varieties of figures from tiny hobbits to giant Elephantoids.  They can brandish swords, tools or futuristic guns.  You can decorate the bases, customize posing to a pretty impressive degree, change facial features and expressions and on and on.  New features are always being added. It's truly impressive and for pure creative entertainment value it's high on my list of favourite sites on the web.

 

I will, of course, post whatever figure I end up buying and the painting process.  I can't promise it'll be a turtle and I won't guarantee the paint job, but two things are certain:

 

1.  It'll be my own unique creation.

2.  It'll have pants.

 

Stay tuned.